Indiana girl at heart 46062 317-350-0037 tparke@terriswritings.com MWF 9a-12p Tuesday-Thursday 2p-4pm Also by appointment

PodCast 2: Childhood Heroes

Just Mosby and Me

A podcast about childhood heroes, based on an article by a similar name.

Take a listen if you can!

Thanks!

www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-fhh5e-ab73ad

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Gotta Let the Dog Out

And Other Things People Say and Do to Motivate and Stay on Task

Have you ever been somewhere, where you wanted to be at first, and then you wanted to leave?

I usually want to be where I am, and my brother usually wants to be where he is going next.  I have noticed that once I get somewhere, I have to give myself a schedule to leave or else I will just stay until everyone has left.

For him, he likes to set a timeline which allows him to stay long enough, and then he frequently leaves just a little bit before that time is up.

I think an accurate description for my brother and me is that I have stagnant inertia (or lack of inertia), so I like to stay where I am, and he has forward inertia, because he is always moving to the next thing.

Currently, I am grand-pup sitting.

I was sitting in my local Starbucks last week, where I have gotten to know several other people who also spend time in Starbucks.

My son, one of the puppy’s dads, was home sleeping, and so was Mosby, our puppy. He is just about 1.5, so he’s still got another 1.5 years of puppy-dom.

The person I was sitting next to had to leave to drive to a different town.  I utilized that opportunity to leave as well, since I wanted to make sure I got home to the puppy at a decent time.

I said ‘I need to let the puppy out’. This was a true statement, and was what was helping motivate me to move from my current location of Starbucks.

My new friend was reminded of someone who used to say that as his ‘goodbye’ line.  The person (he could not remember where his reference came from), used to say that everytime he was ready to leave.

It is probably the equivalent of saying ‘I have to go, I have a meeting’, which I said a lot in my previous role as Director at a social service agency.

The thing was, I almost always did have a meeting to attend.  I supervised 13 staff, had meetings in four counties, and I have a tendency to chat.

Due to my own love of chatting, at work I try to limit my chatting times to right before I have to be somewhere.

This leads me to a couple of things to think about for today:

What things do you like to say when you need to transition from one location to another, and you don’t have a ‘work’ or  ‘obligation’ reason to do that?

What helps motivate you to go somewhere when you would rather stay where you are?

If you are someone who has trouble motivating yourself to start doing something, what self-talk, action, or reward do you give yourself to help yourself get it done?

If you are someone who is more likely to stay where you are, what words, phrases, or incentives do you use to help yourself get to that next place?

If you always want to move on the next thing, what timelines do you give yourself to stay where you are before moving on?

Now for today’s goal: Set yourself a guideline to do something, whether it is a work obligation, a fun obligation, or just something for you, and try to make that happen.

Now set a goal for when you want that to happen-how about today, tomorrow, or at least this week?

Kindle on a Beach
An Afternoon at the Beach is not something where I need to be motivated to be

Have a great day! Hope your motivational efforts are effective and help you complete a task or two today.

Saturday Mornings

Do you just love Saturday mornings?

I do.

I love sitting in the near quiet, this morning with a very tired dog at my side and a sleepy husband upstairs.

I love the chance to do what I want with zero time limits.

Let’s talk about time

I grew up in a house where time (the time on a clock) was very important.

With parents who were teachers (music teachers, no less), they had to pay very close attention to the clock all of the time to make sure their students came and went at the appropriate time to get that ‘specials’ time in.

With a brother as a teacher who also coached swimming for several years, we often joke that he pays attention to time to the milisecond, and I round to 15 minute intervals.

In the social service world, most time increments are rounded to the closest 15 minutes.

We know that if it is 7 minutes or less past the hour, it counts at 4:00, but get it to last until 4:08 and you are talking 4:15.

One of my favorite parts of Saturdays in the house where my children grew up in is that we did not pay attention to the clock nearly as much on weekends as we did during the rest of the week.

We ate when we got hungry.

That can be challenging when we are trying to eat together and we have all woken up at different times.

There are several questions about what time each of us has eaten breakfast, and if you do not eat breakfast at all then you want your lunch the earliest of all of us.

During my sons’ teen years, waking them up in time for lunch was a pretty significant challenge, so we frequently either ate without them or convinced them to go pick us up something to eat from one of our favorite restaurants (shout out to Chick Fila and QDoba here)

Now that we are primarily empty nesters, time is even less important. My natural rhythms get me up with the sun, or a little before. I spent my middle school years having practice before school, so I literally wake up ready to play basketball or volleyball (be glad you don’t live with me-I’ll launch right into that conversation we left off with last night as if we are still mid-thought)

For my differently circadium rhythm’ed husband, mornings are not nearly as exciting as they are to me. He loves to sleep until he wake up, which is not necessarily when the sun is coming up, although with the noises in the house (ahem, guilty) it is usually near that time.

Ahhhh….Quiet Time

This morning, I’m having a quiet morning with our Grand-Puppy, Mosby.  He is nearly 1.5 years old, he usually lives with college students so he too likes to sleep in, and he was so grateful when I let him out real quick to go to the bathroom when I came downstairs at 6:45 (after 45 minutes of being awake).

How This Can Apply to You

Here are a couple of questions for today:

What are some simple pleasures you really enjoy? When you think of something that really makes you think ‘wow, that is just something I really enjoy’, what images or sounds comes to mind?

A sound I love is acoustic music. when I imagine Eric Clapton playing on ‘Unplugged’, I can feel myself getting more relaxed.

What is a sound that is help

I love to look at water

How are you able to get those needs met as you also parent, work, relax, talk with friends, and avoid talking with people you would rather not talk to?

What are some ways you can work to increase the amount of time you focus on your simple pleasures? How can you spend a day ignoring the clock and listening to your belly to know it is time to eat, or a day where you are driven by the clock to do things you want to do?

 

Live to Dance

a pictures of Cinceraria flowers with
Flowers!

Let’s Have a Dance-Off!

I love dancing.

I spent some time with one of my nieces this weekend, who also loves to dance.

She suggested that we have a dance-off.  It is important to note that she has been taking dance classes for 4 years or so, maybe even longer.  Also, she’s about 7 and a half. As you can imagine, she’s a pretty good dancer.

She’s full of energy, she’s fun, and she dances when she hears a beat.  

That beat she hears (imagine: 5,6,7,8!) keeps her on beat, whether the beat is coming from the radio or from the song in her head.

Now, I ask you to imagine her Aunt Terri.

I am older than 7 by about 4 decades. I also have high energy, am fun, and move my body ‘just a titch’ if I hear a beat.

One guess who won the dance-off. Actually, it depends who you ask. I say I did and she says she did.  

She tried to get her grandma (my mom) to be the judge, but Grandma was busy trying to ignore our antics; therefore, she was unable to declare a winner.

The issue for today: What drives us.

As I have mentioned in previous aricles, I have some unreliable ligaments. 

I have a habit of testing their limits, and since I am also very, very competitive, I wanted to win that dance contest.

I had to remember that even though I wanted to win and show that little girl what a ‘real’ dancer could do, her skills were well above mine.

She is currently in dance class each week, is talented in dancing skills and she is self-confident.

We have a mutual love of each other.

Later, when we were done with dancing (or during one of our many breaks where I was lying on the floor) we made a video on my phone.

In that video, she commented that I was the ‘worst aunt ever’.

I took it as the compliment that was intended.

No matter whether we are cooperating or coordinating with people who have similar traits to us, sometimes it works well to work together.

Sometimes it does not work as well and it causes stress and barriers.

Sometimes, what we like best in ourself becomes a frustration for us when we find the same characteristic in someone else.

The same can be true of someone with whom we share much less in common.  

A person who really likes to talk (guilty) frequently spends a lot of time with people who talk much less.

The compatibility of people who have opposite strengths can really work well together.

Imagine a couple who works well together with one who is more interested in big ideas and another who is more interested in the detail work.

Another example occurs with employees in a business who cooperate well together.  

I envision that some of those employees like to have decisions made for them, and some of the people working like to be decision makers.  

There are also people who have the role of middle managers, who prefer to have a balance of decision making and following decisions of others .

In a business, the leader, known as President or CEO or Executive Director, makes some of the final decisions.

The second in command might be shared by several people, or just one or two.  The seconds in commands, knowns as Vice Presidents, Executive Team, or Directors, tend to work well with their leaders when things are going well.

Some people in this position can be the people in charge of raising money for the organization (Development), the person in charge of making sure the organization run smoothly (Operations) and the person who is in charge of the quality of the work (Clinical).

A third group in the scenario are what are commonly referred to in the social service field as Direct Care workers, or front line staff.  Sometimes this group is referred to as ‘the people who do the work’.

This group includes the people who have the role of conducting the work that is the ‘meat’ of the business. Other terms for this role are ‘agents’ or ‘entry level’ positions.

The final group in this scenario is one of my other favorites, which is the person who has the title ‘Assistant’ in their job description.  An assistant’s role is to assist with what is needed.  

Their role can include helping the leader disperse information clearly and be prepared for meetings, answering the phone, and returning messages when the phone is not answered immediately.  

I refer to assistants as those who ‘keep the wheels running smoothly’.

When you have the chance to do something you love to do, or something which drives you and something you enjoy doing, I encourage you to find a way to do it.

I encourage you to work toward getting to the place where you have the opportunity to do things you enjoy, even if it is difficult.

I love to dance. The way that I meet that need is by listening to music, singing along, and moving my body a little bit.

Here’s a couple of final questions for this article:

What can you find to do today, this week, or within the month that is something you think about, that helps drive you?

How can you include the things that motivate you with the things that do not motivate you as much?

Have fun!

Tryin’ to Decide on a Costume?

Boy playin’ Baseball

A pictures of 3 15 year old boys wearing masks on their faces
Three Teens with Masks on at Sunset

Click the link below to learn about some of my favorite parts of some of the costumes I wore, and how that was meaningful to me.

https://www.thriveglobal.com/stories/48509-what-should-i-be-for-halloween-this-year-a-clown-again

 

Family Dinners

Mosby loves family dinners

Friends having a great time interactin’

Please click on the underlined ‘thrive global’ above link which is above the picture of the friends. Happy Reading!

 

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